It started out with a few blasphemic cases which arose in Pakistan and got me thinking back in 2012. The more I thought about it the more I believed we are doing something wrong. I used to think to myself about it came to the conclusion that I was not a Muslim as I lacked the conviction of the faith. I felt like I was being overshadowed by something and I couldn\'t quite understand it at that time. I lacked an identity and confidence to tell my friends and family that I no longer believe in the religion I was brought up in. I am scared to bits when I think about it because I live my family and if they find out I will be lashed at by the very people I deeply care and love the most. My parents are very religious and up to a very dangerous level if I may say so myself. I am scared to tell them and I feel if j do tell them they will disown me which is eating me alive and I have grown restless by the thought of this. I can\'t sleep, work or concentrate on this very hard reality we call life. Being a non believer of Islam is proving to be tearing me apart because I only keep thinking about my family.